Not now please

successIt is always at the most inappropriate times that what I really want comes up. There is so much going both on the work front and my personal life front that I wish this opportunity (?) could have waited for a few more months.

I had an email from the landlord of a shop front asking if I was interested in his shop. The way things are I am not sure.  I viewed the shop about a year ago and the landlord would not drop his rent. So I moved on.

If the same opportunity came up about 3 months ago I would have jumped at the chance. Now I am not sure if I would cope with a shop front at this stage of my life.

I say this stage because I think there is some change in me that wants to live a different life to the one I had envisioned 3 months ago. The trigger for this change is my mother’s declining heath. Last 4 years have been hell for her. It is not easy of anyone of us to see this. In addition, for two years before she was the main carer for my father.

The thing is I am confused. I am not sure what sort of life I want now. Working in a nice comfortable office, without too much pressure? Or am I still the ambitious person wanting to grow my business substantially. I honestly did not think three months ago that I was taking a back seat type of guy.

May be my current thinking  is just temporary. I am not sure. Am I that old that I want an easy life now? May be it is the change that scares me?

I do not know what to do. This blog raised more questions than helped me. I am going mad since I am on my own in the office today.